Liberals say the darnedest things. They're not as cute as the things kids come out with -- because having millions of adults who are stuck in false beliefs is not only scary, but also places our society as a whole in jeopardy.

Here's a fun exercise for conservatives: Spend some time observing liberals who are waxing philosophic. Don't bother to think about the words they say -- liberals seldom use rational thought. Just turn off the left side of your brain and enjoy. I've been shocked, amazed, and confused every time I've tried it.

I submit the following pearls of political wisdom, from apparently intelligent liberals, for your consideration (listed in no particular order):

• “But we have to pass the [health care] bill so that you can find out what is in it, away from the fog of the controversy." ~Speaker Nancy Pelosi

• “They ask me all the time. What is your favorite this? What is your favorite that? And one time, what is your favorite word? And I said, ‘My favorite word. That is really easy. My favorite word is The Word, is the Word.’ And that is everything; it says it all for us.” ~Speaker Nancy Pelosi

• “Drain the swamp we did, as this was a terrible place. We made a tremendous difference, and I take great pride in that. ~Speaker Nancy Pelosi

• "Now, suddenly, if you don’t have your papers, and you took your kid out to get ice cream, you’re going to get harassed — that’s something that could potentially happen… That’s not the right way to go." ~President Barack Obama

• "The American people will never knowingly adopt socialism, but under the name of liberalism they will adopt every fragment of the socialist program until one day America will be a socialist nation without ever knowing how it happened." ~Norman Thomas, six-time Socialist Party presidential candidate and one of the founders of the ACLU

• "The children who know how to think for themselves, spoil the harmony of the collective society that is coming, where everyone (would be) interdependent." ~John Dewey, founder of "progressive education"

• "If the personal freedoms guaranteed by the Constitution inhibit the government's ability to govern the people, we should look to limit those guarantees. ~President Bill Clinton

• “I felt this thrill going up my leg. I mean, I don’t have that too often….And that is an objective assessment.” ~Chris Matthews while gushing over a Barack Obama speech

• "You mean the OxyContin that he was on?...Why couldn’t he have croaked from it instead of Heath Ledger?" ~Bill Maher commenting on Rush Limbaugh

• "You see, the challenges we face will not be solved with one meeting in one night. It will not be resolved on even a Super Duper Tuesday. Change will not come if we wait for some other person or if we wait for some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek." ~President Barack Obama

• "It's a great moment. I'm proud to have been here. No one will know until this is actually in place how it works. But we believe we've done something that has been needed for a long time. It took a crisis to bring us to the point where we could actually get this job done." ~Senator Christopher J. Dodd after passing financial reform

• "I have trouble listening to what [Dick Cheney] says sometimes, because of the blood that drips from his teeth while he's talking. But my response is this: He's just angry because the president doesn't shoot old men in the face. But by the way, when he was done speaking, did he just then turn into a bat and fly away?" ~Alan Grayson

• "It’s my duty and pride tonight to be able to announce exactly what the Republicans plan to do for health care in America… It’s a very simple plan. Here it is. The Republican health care plan for America: don’t get sick. If you have insurance don’t get sick, if you don’t have insurance, don’t get sick; if you’re sick, don’t get sick. Just don’t get sick. … If you do get sick America, the Republican health care plan is this: die quickly.” ~Alan Grayson

The constraints of time and space prevent me from listing them all, but the previous selections are certainly some of my favorites. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to share your favorite liberal head-scratcher with the rest of Newsvine. Let the games begin...

Editor's note: Hat tip to Pat N. for the inspiration to write this article